Communication is key
in all healthy relationships.
What is healthy communication? This involves speaking to
your partner with intent to better understand them. This doesn’t involve
technology and shouldn’t be done through a phone on social media. No texting is
involved, and you have to actually use your vocal cords and words to create sentences
and speak to another person face to face. If you cannot put down your phone to
create healthy communication with your loved ones you will not have healthy
relationships.
Communicating with friends is important! To maintain friendships,
you have you must put effort into those relationships. A friend will not stick
around if you don’t want to be around them. They won’t stick around if you lie
or hide your feelings from them. They will not stick around if you are upset, hold
grudges, and let feelings fester without talking to them about it. Without
communication, friendships fall apart.
Communicating with your parents is important. Will your parents
always love you no matter what? Yes, of course. But it will be beneficial for
your relationship to talk to one another about your feelings. When you have a
problem or don’t agree with something your parents are doing, tell them! Communicate
with them, and maybe they will be able to see what you see and do something
about it!
Siblings are the same. Time and time again, I have seen
siblings get butt hurt about small, insignificant instances and these instances
destroy relationships. When siblings aren’t willing to problem solve and
communicate with each other they bury their feelings. The key to healthy communication
is saying how you feel but ALSO be able to have compassion towards their
feelings. Try to understand how they feel and what they are saying. Do not focus
on being understood, focus on understanding the other person. When both parties
focus on what is best for the other person, everyone’s needs are being met. Don’t
let small insignificant things destroy the bonds you and your siblings have
been building since you were kids.
No one can hurt you like your spouse can. That is why healthy
communication with your spouse is so important. You will marry someone who can understand you.
This person is likely to do selfish things and hurt you. You are likely to do
selfish things and hurt your spouse. You have to be willing to let your spouse
breath your air. Save your spouse and your relationship by expressing empathy
and invite awareness of the other’s feelings. Talk about what upset you. Your
spouse cannot be better if they do not know what they are doing wrong.
If you want to be close to another person you have to give
up blame. Yes, other people will offend you, they will do things to upset you
and often times choose to selfishly do what hurts you the most. Forgiveness along
with communication will help a relationship flourish. Blaming someone only
hurts you. It destroys all opportunity for healing in a relationship. You can
blame someone for the things they have done to you but remember, it is not what
is best for you.
If you are not defensive it gives others the opportunities
to put their weapons of war down. It gives both parties involved, the opportunity
to build healthy relationships you will be happier and so will the people you
love most. Use your words to speak to the ones you love. Hold them close and
let them know you love them. Love drives all healthy communication. Do it
because you love them. Save the relationship because you love them. Problem solve
and communicate because you love them.
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